Ex-pats, medical care and helping each other

I love this snap of Munchkin #2. She was totally thrilled when a 'baby' falcon landed on her head. Only in the Middle East!

Well, Munchkin #2's rheumatoid arthritis is getting worse. Docs here and in the home country are in touch with each other working out what meds to try. It's really hard as a parent hearing your active kid say, "Mum, please come down stairs to sign my paper for school. It hurts too much for me to walk upstairs."

Living outside of the home country, one has to learn a totally different medical system. It's very hard when you are sick or have sick kids trying to figure out who to see, what hospitals to use, etc..... For some people, the medical care is far superior to what they've left at home. For others, like us, it's not anywhere near the quality we are used to. It's tough making an adjustment backwards.

When faced with something like rheumatoid arthritis, especially in a kid, as an expat you immediately start thinking about moving home. Is it worth it to totally uproot the family, pull the husband away from work he enjoys, change schools again in order to get closer to the doctors? Right now, I don't know. We're going to have to wait. Supposedly, there's a pediatric rheumatologist moving here in about a month. We're hopeful.

When living so very far away from family, you must put a support network in place right away. If something difficult happens, your friends become your biggest source of support. Many women here spend hours, and drink oceans of coffee, building their 'mum' network. If a mum gets sick and can't get kids to and from school, the 'mum' network kicks in. We all help each other.

Through all of this, it's hard to focus on everything that needs attention. Munchkin #1 is feeling like Munchkin #2 is getting more attention than he is. He feels that she is the 'favourite'. Ouch. I deeply love both my kids. He and I have talked, but it's so very hard when one child is suffering so much.

We're all ready for winter break. I'm really hoping that for a few days, we can all just hang out, hide out and do nothing but be together.

Peace.

Tough questions

When you live outside of your home country, you must ask yourself and discuss tough questions with your family.

The husband and I are thinking of buying another vehicle here. He's been all kinds of freaked out about the munchkins and I driving around in my current smallish vehicle of choice. The 'new' vehicle would cost more than what we paid for our current vehicle of choice. I refuse to drive a 'mum's taxi'. We're looking at used Land Rovers. Which brought up some other questions.....

Are the munchkins happy here?
Are we - the adults - happy here?
Are we ok with the current state of medicine here (ie we might have to start flying mum and Munchkin #2 home every few months or so for doctors)?
As we acquire more costly possessions here, how do we set up our paperwork to deal with sharia law (sp?) should, God forbid, something happen to the husband?
Do we really honestly and truly want to stay here for the next 7 years?

When we first left the homecountry, it was on a 2 year contract. We're now in our 5th year. And we're staring down 7 more here. We've got a dog, a cat, stuff that we own here that we like. Tough tough questions. At what point do you say, "It's time to go home."

As for the medical....it's weird. Docs are better in the home country with regards to Munchkin #2's medical condition. But, our medical benefits are WAY better living outside the home country. It's probably cheaper/better to fly home an extra two times a year than moving home to be closer to the docs. Totally utterly messed up!

The munchkins seem to be really happy here. The husband seems to be happy here. I have no clue how I feel. I loathe not feeling like I can take care of myself in this place simply because I'm a woman. Feeling so totally dependent on the husband is a horrid feeling. I don't care if it comes with a Land Rover with a leather interior and vacations in 5-star hotels - feeling dependent just because I have two X chromosomes is rotten. I live from plane ticket to plane ticket.

Tough questions.

Peace.

Thpppttttt!!!!!

That's the sound of sticking out your tongue, closing you lips around it and blowing. Yup. That sums it up.

Busy, busy, busy. There's never enough time in the day to do all that I want to do. So...I sit here and write at my computer. Writing helps me clear my head. Calms me down.

Part of being an ex-pat is dealing with the constant travel. The husband's most recent trip was to Cairo. We'll be flying through Amsterdam over the Winter Break. Lots and lots of travel. I have to travel to see family, I have to travel to stock up and bits of stuff I can't get here, I have to travel to feel like it really is 'winter break'.

As a kid, I lived in terms of school years. The end of Spring term was the 'end of the year'. As an adult, I started to think in terms of when taxes were due, when this bill or that bill was due. Now, as an ex-pat, I think and live in terms of plane tickets. When are we going home? Have we bought the plane tickets yet? How long can we stay at home? Can we work something fun into all that flying like a day trip somewhere? Do we still have blank pages in the passports for visa stamps? Do we have enough of the correct kind of currency? Do we have the warm clothes that we'll need? And on and on and on....... Makes my head spin.

In the middle of all of THAT, there's the usual school end of Fall term stuff to deal with. There's holiday parties.

Time to go back to work.

Peace.

Understanding each other

I had a really cool experience recently. I needed to purchase a child's foam mattress to use a dog bed (much cheaper than buying a specifically made doggie bed here). There's an older part of town that is lined with shops that sell all kinds of household goods at much cheaper prices than the local hypermarkets. I went into one and bought a small mattress at a good price (about $6 US). The shopkeeper asked me where I was from. Now, this can get tricky. Are they going to get upset when they hear where I'm from? Nobody talks about government and politics, but it's always out there dancing in the room.

I smiled, "Can you guess?" That's always good fun for me. It's an excellent game. When I was in a tough spot one time, I claimed to be German when the shopkeeper guessed, "German?" - and it worked - no political discussion followed. {Note to my Dad - brush up on your German. It's great to talk in a language shopkeepers don't know when you're discussing a price.}

Well, on this one day, I knew my surroundings etc....blah blah blah....so when the shopkeeper couldn't guess I told him. He said, "Really? I am from Iran." The political discussion that followed was really very good. Three other shop keepers joined in with lots of laughs following. The general consensus is that Persians and many westerners are actually very much alike. We love our countries, we value education, we pride ourselves in hard work. We demand to be taken seriously by those around us. The things that we see in the news whether it's BBC, CNN or Al Jazeera do not really reflect the people represented by various governments. There is 'government' and then there's 'the people'.

Here's to hoping that cooler heads, open minds, and friendships prevail over less savory alternatives.

Peace.

Not much happening

Well....not much happening. But, I thought I write a quick post to prove that I'm alive and kicking. It's been very busy the past few weeks. I can't even remember what my last post was about.

Just in case....and because I'm too lazy to go back and read through my old posts....

Munchkin #2 was diagnosed with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. She's on meds - a very high dosage of anti-inflamatory 'naproxen'. It seems to be working. She'll go back to her sport of choice this week. We're all very very greatful and thankful for all the help, love and support.

The husband has to make a trip to Cairo. I am so very envious. Maybe I can send him shopping a bit for me? I'm glad he gets to travel around so much. But, we all miss him here when he's gone.

Oooooooo..... I almost forgot! We adopted a kitty! He's four years old, has a 'bent up' right front paw, and meows A LOT. He came with the name 'Hoppy'. We thought that was lame and wimpy. We've renamed him 'Max'. Right now, he's confined to an empty spare storage room, hallway, and the kitchen. After Winter Break, we'll let him out to explore the garden. He loves to cuddle all curled up in your lap. He's a nice addition to our critters.

I guess we do have a lot happening.

Peace.

Heading Home and Expat health care

Well, I've thrown in the towel with the 'local' doctors. Munchkin #2 and I are heading for the home country.

I live in this place where the hospitals and clinics are all new and pretty on the outside. Many times, the equipment is also new and pretty. But, it is so very frustrating to be told that, "No can't help you. Go home." At least the docs have the courage and honesty to say that. I totally admire that level of honesty and courage. I admire so very many people here which is part of what I love about living here.

I find it totally fascinating that so very many leaders from so many countries in this region head to Europe or the States for medical care. Why? Just an interesting question; don't you think?

I've met some really great doctors who have left the region because working here is so very very different from what they are used to. Folks here are very business savvy, and they work hard to attract great talent. I just so wish we could keep all that talent in the region. I think, folks leave because no matter how pretty, no matter how good the money, if you're not cut out for expat life then you won't be happy. Education of the local population is totally key. But, all the important folks here know that and are actively working on it. It's a complex problem. Again, more admiration from me. Complex problems take loads of work and vision.

When we made the choice to change countries and become expats, besides school for the munchkins, my other MAJOR concern was access to health care. I DEMANDED that we always have an exit strategy (ie a way to head for home if local docs couldn't do what we needed). It's been over four years now, and we're having to use that exit strategy.

If you EVER think about moving countries, take a long hard look at available health care. Just because it's shiny and pretty doesn't mean they'll be able to fix you. Just hope the doctors you encounter are honest. This region may not be perfect, but at least I've encountered a lot of folks with a lot of integrity.

Peace.

The C#$p continues

My daughter loves sport. Running, jumping, she'd been thinking about going out for the school football team next year (that's soccer to any U.S. readers), and here you see the latest sport 'log rolling'.

This sport has its origins in the lumber industry where years ago cut timber was sent to the mills by floating it downriver. Learning how to balance on a log in a flowing river was a reasonable work skill that was later put to fun use. I am prouder than I can say that my Munchkin #2 is interested in this sport. In all fairness, Munchkin #1 also loves sport but he is very particular about 'what' sport. And thanks to a few years of training now under his belt, he's gotten good at what he does!

Part of being a mum is getting my kids to and from after-school sports. It is a lot of hard work getting everyone where they need to be and staying on time, especially in constant heavy traffic. But, I never complain about it. I'm so happy my munchkins have found stuff they enjoy doing.

Now....for the bad word part....
Here comes the crap....
Munchkin #2's school has a very good health office. One of the nurses told us that IF Munchkin #2 has a form of arthritis that heat rather than ice might help relieve the pain. So, I invested a small sum in a teddy bear shaped microwaveable gel pack. It made the sore knee feel much better. But, once the heat wore off, it was back to the pain.

Munchkin #2 slept in my room last night. She is becoming a bit sad which is incredibly painful as a mum to witness. She's so very frustrated that all the after-school sport has come grinding to a full stop. I didn't sleep well last night. I kept waking up hoping Munchkin #2 was sleeping well. When she woke up this morning, she was in so much pain it was very hard for her to walk. What absolute total crap. To see this energetic athletic young kid having trouble walking in the morning like an old lady is horrid.

I'm so ready to totally give up on the doctors in this region and head for home. Words can't even begin to describe it.

Peace. (and hopefully less crap)

Beware! Bad words coming! Don't read if you're easily offended!

This post is all about (get ready for it.....) crap. Yes, that's right crap. Today's snap, however, is not crap. I posted this green sea turtle because the picture makes me happy.

Ok. First the bad crap then the funny crap.

Bad crap. Munchkin #2's knee hurts - A LOT. It's been bad off and on for over a year now. The other knee hurt too a few years back but seems to be ok now. However, Munchkin #2 told me that it does hurt but she can "live with it." The 'current knee' finally got to the point where we needed to see a doctor again. After seeing a pediatrician and a pediatric orthopaedic surgeon, she was referred to a rheumatologist. She's being tested for arthritis and lyme disease. The first round of arthritis tests came back negative. We're now waiting on the second round and the lyme disease test. The lyme test had to be sent to Germany since they can't really test for it here. The rheumatologist told us that if this next round comes back negative and Munchkin #2 doesn't respond to the massive doses of ibuprofen, we need to seek a pediatric rheumatologist. That would mean a trip home. Crap. It's really crappy to see your child hurting. It's really crappy when the doctors can't figure out what's wrong. It's just all crap.

Ok. Now, for funny crap.

The other weekend, we went snorkeling. We stopped at a roadside stall/stand selling pottery and stuff to pick up a few bits for the back patio and for a friend. I was working on the price of a ceramic (ie terra cotta) turtle with the shopkeeper. I was trying to decide between the painted one and the unpainted one. A very old local gentleman came up to us. He smiled and said hello in Arabic. I responded in Arabic. He looked at me and what I was thinking about buying. He pointed to the unpainted turtle and said in English, "That one crap." Then, he pointed to the painted one, "That one good. That one." I thanked him, again in Arabic. The shopkeeper was laughing a lot at this point. I told the shopkeeper, "Ok, that one crap. I will buy the painted one." More laughter from the shopkeeper. And, I got a very good price.

Once we got home, the painted turtle was so pretty, I ended up putting it in my villa entrance instead of the back patio. I'm so glad that older gentleman told me the other one was crap.

Peace.

A most excellent weekend

Had a wonderful weekend with the family. Since the husband is headed off further east on business, it was really nice to have some family time together. Fish and family - a great way to unwind after a stressful week.

We tried a new spot for snorkeling this weekend. It was beautiful and an easy swim. But, we still prefer a spot further north (the spot where we've taken Grandma, and cousins). There were a few nice corals, but not the variety we see further north up the coast.

The video is of a group of surgeon fish who were all hanging out together. The video does not do their colouring justice. Beautiful fish.

Peace.

Meeting other doggies

Well, Ms. Jesse had a lovely morning. She made two new friends when we were out for our morning walk. The two other doggies she had sniffed at through our garden fence back before summer. Their owner/dog mum is a German lady. It is so refreshing to do something 'normal' like stop for a chat with a fellow dog mum. Living in a region where dogs are 'haram', it is such a lovely blessing to be able to walk a dog.

So what's normal? Normal is whatever you are used to. Some days, living where I live feels normal. Some days, it doesn't. Some days, you wake up and think to yourself, "Why in the world did I ever get on that plane?" You get on that plane because it's an adventure. You get on that plane because you want to broaden your horizons. You want to keep learning, exploring, experiencing. And some days, that adventure, the new normal, is walking your sorta saluki mutt dog and chatting with a neighbor about dogs in a mix of English and German while standing in the Middle East.

Peace.

Can't wait to go snorkeling

Well......I'm a bit calmer than I was when I wrote my last post. But, I've loads to write about.

First, the new pediatric pulmonologist rocks. We're really excited. Munchkin #2's inhaled steroid level is going to come down, but she's now on a 'more powerful' med. And, she no longer has to use the 'bear breather' (what we called her spacer). Unless you've got an asthmatic child, you probably won't 'get' this, but we're really really happy. It was delightfully refreshing to talk with a doc again who REALLY gets asthmatic kids. Cost before insurance? 1 visit = $125U.S. but knowing your kid is gonna feel better and do better = priceless. And price of meds for one month before insurance = $300U.S. Thank you that we've got the ability to pay for all this!

Next, Munchkin #2 has Osgood-Schlatters Disease in her right knee. She'd had this for over a year and a half now. Up until this point, it's been manageable for her. Last spring, she developed bursitis on one side of her knee. It was the end of the sports season so again it was manageable. But now....she's developed a whopping bit of bursitis in a different area of her knee. She's been 'off' her P.E. classes at school, no running/jumping at recess and definately no sport after school! If you know my very athletic munchkin, then you know just how horrid hard that is. But, the thing hurts so bad she sits willingly at recess. We went back to the pediatrician for a second time today, and he's finally referred her on to a pediatric orthopedist. Reading on the internet and talking with family who are in sports medicine, more than likely the next course of action will be x-rays, and either drain the fluid and/or inject hydrocortisone into the knee. So...we'll see. Needless to say, we'll be giving our insurance policy an excellent 'test' so to speak here in the Middle East. Poor Munchkin #2 is so uncomfortable and tired of not being able to do sport that she was hoping they'd stick needles in her knee today!

I'm just so thankful that this all didn't happen our first year in the region. I think I'd be going nuts just trying to drive to these places!

We are all so going to need that snorkeling weekend coming up. I just hope Munchkin #2's knee is ok enough.

Then, it'll be time to find Munchkin #1 an orthodontist!

Peace.

Feeling 'female dog-ish' - BEWARE! Rant coming!

Ever just feel 'female dog-ish'? I've been dealing with constant traffic rudeness today. I can't take care of simple stuff for my family 'cause I'm not the 'man'. Trying my best to help others in my current community. Just feeling frustrated. Too much to do, not enough time.

I know I'm cranky when I want to buy flowers at the market. Flowers smell nice, they're pretty. They're fun. Seeing men who make so little money it's shameful walking the roads hoping for a ride, hearing about desperate need and feeling so powerless - it's frustrating. Seeing folks so full of needing to feel powerful, that they neglect to utilize or reach out to the resources around them. Seeing folks get into a power trip about 'helping' is bizarre. And yet, I see it here. Helping others isn't about feeling good yourself. It's about OTHERS.

I get people asking me all the time to help their kids (it's part of what I do). And my first thought is always, "Well, what are YOU doing? What have YOU tried? Or are you just trying to pawn off your responsibility onto someone else?" Granted, I'd never say this to some one directly, but some parents I just don't get.

I see a lot of garbage in other people's marriages over here (amongst the ex-pats). Affairs, 'kept' women in different countries, marriage for money and not for love etc, men paying for 'services'. Blah, blah, blah...the list goes on. But, the one that takes the cake...... Wife is possibly dying (being treated for cancer), husband sues for divorce, gets the housekeeper to testify against the wife in the HOME COUNTRY, then takes the kids away from the possibly dying mum to be raised by, essentially, the maid back here in the Middle East. What the $&*$ ? Really? How nasty can it get?

Yup. Female dog-ish. Had a good friend go in for a surgery (gynecological procedure). Insurance made her sit the morning of the surgery for 8 hours before approving it. The insurance was all kinds of worried that she was a single and IF she was a pregnant lady! Really? Wow. 8 hours. She's NEVER been pregnant! Insurance had blood work and ultrasound pics!

To ladies in Western Countries - don't flush your rights. Hang on to them with both fists squeezed tight. Do you live some place where people know how to wait their turn in a line? Appreciate it! Don't take it for granted!

Peace (I know I could sure use some). Maybe I should go flush some money on some pretty flowers.

Doctors and Education and Asthma

Jesse, in this snap, is sitting hopefully at the front door awaiting the first day of school. She's even sporting the proper tie for a girl. But, as cute as I think Jesse is, that's not what I want to write about.

My Munchkin #2 is asthmatic. Now, to someone who's never dealt with this, you may not fully 'get it' when I say it's not fun to deal with. My kid can look totally normal one minute, then suddenly start coughing, and then if left un-checked, is suddenly down for the count. It's not fun.

We've dealt with breathing issues with her since she was 6 monthes old. Yup, forever. Repeatedly, doctors misdiagnosed her. "She's got RSV, she's got allergies, it's just a cold, it's pollution in the city". I have heard it all. I'll never forget waking up in the middle of night (she was like 2 1/2?), Munchkin #2 was sleeping next to me, I looked over at her. She was sound asleep but panting like a racehorse. Poor kid couldn't breathe. I took her into our pediatrician at the time. "Not to worry. Lungs sound great. Probably just a bad dream." ????? Great? My baby couldn't breathe!

When she was 3, she ended up in the emergency room - high fever, horrid cough, couldn't breathe. The doc did chest pictures - looked like pneumonia. Pumped her full of antibiotics and told me to keep using the basic meds in the nebulizer (the 'breathing machine'). With an emergency room visit under our belts I finally was able to get her on the waiting list to see a pediatric pulmonologist.

While on the wait list - it happened again. She couldn't breathe. This time, there was no coughing. She just laid down on the floor, wide awake, and couldn't get up. Not even for the brand new bike she'd gotten and ridden that morning. We rushed to the emergency department at the hospital. We phoned a local doc who was a long time friend of our family and folks we knew in the community (we were visiting my parents when this happened, in a different city). Munchkin #2, after hours of messing about in the ER, suddenly, with one phone call, had a private room. She did have pneumonia. But, it was a kind that in most people would be just a cold. This lovely doc said, "She has asthma." THANK YOU!!!! Finally, a doc willing to make that diagnosis! After 3 days in the hospital, with a proper diagnosis in hand, we were off of the pulmonogy group wait list.

Pediatric Pulmonology saved her life and changed her life. She is now a top sports competitor. She's a top student. But, most importantly, the pediatric pulmonolgy group we saw educated me. I learned about flow meters. I learned about retraction. I learned about maintenance meds. I learned about rescue meds. They put Munchkin #2 on meds that other docs were too chicken to prescribe. It totally changed her life. And mine.

Now, living in a foreign country, we've had to wade through all this s%&$ again. Dealing with docs and others who don't have a clue for four long years. If our original pulmonology group hadn't taken the many hours to educate me, we never would have made it living abroad.

Today, I finally found a pediatric pulmonologist in this country - with an excellent medical background/education. I'm thrilled. Munchkin #2 has an appointment for next week. I'm very hopeful. She's been breathing ok it seems, but gets headaches after practicing sport. And, because of the steriods she must inhale to function, there are worries about her growth - the fact that she's been tiny since birth doesn't help.

If the doctors had listened in the first place, if I hadn't pushed and pushed and pushed, if I hadn't had an excellent science education, then things would all have been much different.

Peace.

Wake-up and smell the coffee

No time today to write a 'proper' post. I just wanted to bring a brief opinion piece to US voters' attention:

http://gulfnews.com/opinions/columnists/perry-more-bush-than-bush-himself-1.870405. Yes, the piece was written by a guy in Vermont, but the fact that it has been published in an Arab world daily newspaper....shows you very quickly what folks in the region think and feel about Perry.

If the US wants to even remotely be taken seriously in international circles, then Americans need to stay away from Perry.

Peace.

Local News and Technology in Education

I've been reading news for the last 45 minutes or so (I'm out and about/traveling a bit - time to read). I just read about escalating violence in Sana'a, Yemen (hope I spelled that right) and about an explosion in Ankara, Turkey. When I was still residing in 'the West', I'd read that kind of stuff and feel bad. I'd feel sad for those hurt and affected by the violence. And, I'd go on about life, feeling like I couldn't do much about it. Now, when I read this kind of stuff, it's feels 'local'. I've met people in Yemen. Yemen isn't all the 'nasty' you read in the news. There are beautiful places there (I'm told the snorkeling is fabulous). When I hear about violence there I think, "Wow. I hope so and so is ok." The same for news from Turkey. Once of my best friends here in the region has a home in Istanbul. For me, international news now feels like local news. Living outside of my home country, the world feels so much smaller. As I sit here writing this in a coffee cafe, there are ladies dressed like me (pants, t-shirt), there are ladies in abayas, there are people speaking Arabic, English, Tagalog, and another language I didn't recognize. But we're all about the same business - visiting with people, enjoying wi-fi access and drinking coffee. The world feels so much smaller to me these days.

As a brief note: This clinic is still up and running. They still need financial support. They are the only one of its kind in Yemen.

http://christchurchaden.org I believe the church is currently closed (this is not an ad for the church!) but the Ras Morbat Clinic.

Now...on to 'technology in education.' I just read fun blog post (my stupid old laptop won't let me cut-n-paste the link...grrrrrr.....). The blog is http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com. It's the post from 18 September 2011. It's about how technology is changing education. Kids are growing up totally wired (not on coffee but computers, iPad's etc...). A comment on the post, however, brings up the fact that many many kids in the world can not afford access to that kind of education. So.....it makes me wonder....

For kids getting a 'book only' education - without access to computers and the internet etc...will they be able to someday compete for jobs? Will they be able to lead successful lives? Technologies change and they change the world. The snap I've posted is from a very familiar tree farm. 100 years ago, trees were cut by hand, then came the chain saw, now it's frequently done by big machine with a climate controlled cockpit. How with widening economic gaps, do folks keep up with technology in modern education? I know of a few programs that provide kids with low cost laptops - I think they are even solar powered to help. At least it's a start.

Peace.

SiteTracker stuff

Thanks to SiteTracker for being able to see where my readers are and how they access this blog!

I am totally surprised that folks actually read this blog. I started this to be a way to keep in touch with family and friends who are spread around the globe without having to send out annoying mass emails.

Again.....dear readers....it is never my intention to offend governments etc.... What I do hope is that some folks will read some of these posts and think, "Wow. I could do some small thing to help out somebody else. Maybe I can volunteer my time in a school. Maybe I can donate to a charity." Etc..... I'm hoping that's not too radical a thing.

As always, Peace.

PS - a special note to all four grandparents! The guest room is shaping up nicely. We just bought a lovely table that will work as a desk, with storage for suitcases underneath. It's going to be a 'guest suite' when I'm done! The munchkins are so very excited that grandparents are going to visit us!!!!!

Gossip, Rumour, and Mum Stuff on the Middle East

THIS MAY BE A REALLY OFFENSIVE POST TO SOME PEOPLE. I don't mean to offend; I just want to let folks like my family know what goes on in my daily life.

Ok. I got stuff I just gotta tell you. First, this is all 'gossip'. This is all the kind of stuff a bunch of mums sit around chatting about over a coffee. This is not news. But, it is very real in my little world. Are you politically squeamish? Then stop reading. Right now. THIS IS ALL MUM GOSSIP KIND OF STUFF. THIS IS NOT NEWS!!!!! For the rest of you people who can stomach 'gossip', than read on....

I live a very comfortable life. I have a nice comfortable villa, I drive a vehicle that we own - not the bank. I have more than enough food. And, my children are safe. Where I currently reside is a very comfortable place. It does not fit the stereotype of 'violent Middle East'. This is a good place. But, others are not so fortunate.

I hang out with a very varied group of people. My friends here resemble the UN in miniature. And, one of the things that we like to do here is have breakfast together and chat over LOTS of coffee. The conversations are always friendly, but folks are comfortable with and trust each other enough to speak their minds.

Being one who is not totally afraid (well, I am a little afraid) of controversy, I asked 'the mums' about the whole Palestine going to the UN thing hoping for a seat. I consider myself a fairly well-read individual, but I really don't comprehend a lot of what goes on the Middle East. I said I didn't really 'get' why the States was going to block it.

The response I got was loaded with ideas and opinions. First, every time Israel (or here it is called Occupied Palestine, but I'll say 'Israel' because that's what many of my readers are used to seeing) increases settlements, the Palestinians lose territory. Currently, according to the New York Times, Palestine hopes to set the borders at 1967's borders. This would mean that 500,000 Israeli settlers are then on Palestinian soil. A lot of the mums I chat with think the States is 'nuts' to block this. People I know here really believe that the States is 'giving in' to Jewish lobbyists with loads of dollars. Yes, I have met folks here who believe that Jewish people who are extremely pro-Israel control the United States. Yes, this is 'gossipy' kind of stuff, but it's what a number of folks talk about. So...the feeling is that the US is going to block the Palestinians at the UN because there are Zionist Jews controlling the US government. Is this true? Personally, I don't think so. However, this is what gets talked about.

I live in a region where any maps that you find in stores have 'Israel' blacked out with a magic marker. In newspapers, 'Israel' is always referred to as 'Occupied Palestine'. The level of animosity and anger is deep. But, I have also heard an interesting twist on all this. IF Palestine gets a seat (or whatever the proper wording - I feel so confused today) at the UN, than there are worries that Palestinians who live in camps in other countries outside of Palestine will have to be given passports by the country that they are camped in. So, suddenly if Palestine becomes a recognized state, than loads of Palestinians living abroad would have to be given citizenship to other countries. There is fear here in this region that this would happen. Ok....more confusion for my head..... Gossip, gossip, gossip....

What do I think? What do I feel? I think that after World War II, there were folks who wanted to see Jewish people have their own country after the horror of the Holocaust. But, this came at the expense of the Palestinians. So what happens now? I have not a clue, but I find the whole thing deeply deeply sad. I have friends who have had to run from bombs. They've had to teach their kids how to listen to the bombs to know where the bombs have hit and how long do they have to run to safety before the next bomb hits. It doesn't matter where the bombs were and are. It doesn't matter who's dropping these bombs and why. The bombs make it almost impossible for normal people to live their lives. The world still has a long way to go, especially in the Middle East.

Here's to hoping and praying that the bombs stop. And, here's to hoping and praying that calm prevails.

Peace.

Mission to SeaFarers

Have a look....these folks do great work:

http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F&gl=US#/watch?v=GR--bTeqMuk

The joys of technology and stuff

Currently, the husband is 'rebuilding' my laptop. It had been on life support for a few months and was driving me nuts. So, I find myself blogging via the lovely new gadget in the villa - the IPad. While this thing is very cool for digesting massive amounts of reading and videos, I am not yet thrilled with it for writing and other creative process bits. Plus, I have not yet found a way to move my photos easily between all these different devices. I do enjoy having a lightweight gadget that holds my newspapers, magazines, and books and fits easily into my handbag.

Now, onto the stuff.

If you hadn't figured it out by now, I do a lot of volunteer stuff. Unlike other places where I have donated my time and talents to help others, living here my hands don't get dirty so to speak. I have only once painted a room, I have never done construction work here, and I have never worked in a low income/homeless shelter type daycare here. Here, you go to parties to help others. Say what? Yes, that's right; this is the land of the fundraising party. We actually went and bought a tuxedo for the husband. But why? Why not just give that money to someone who needs it?

I have had more than a few occasions where I have wanted to help with different projects. But, I hear, "Oh, but I didn't see you at our last fundraiser (ie a thing the husband needs a tux for)." How totally mental. So I find myself in a social game of sorts. In order to be taken seriously, in order to help my current community, I must wear fancy party dresses. I just hope that the work that is achieved is worth it. I so miss spending a week of my summer holiday rebuilding a home for someone in need. Why is it so complicated here to help others?

At any rate, I do not wish to sound like a whiner. I just so do not 'get' this place so many days. I would love to rant about why I do not wish to hire a gardener and that I do not enjoy being a sideshow for the neighborhood when I mow the lawn. But, that would be another blog subject.

Peace.

Whew

So hard to believe that we're back for year 5 of living in this region. Where has the time gone?

The best part of living here is all the amazing friends we've made. The hardest part of living here is having to say so many good-byes. Each year is different because so many people move away - typical expat experience. But just because it is typical doesn't make it easy.

When I began blogging 4 years ago, I never dreamt what living here would hold in store for us. I hope that being here continues to be a positive experience for us and that I can continue to be a positive influence in the world around me.

As an extra bit of whatever..........

My laptop is not feeling well these days. If it wasn't for this IPad, I would be really cut off these days. The husband is taking this little gadget when he's traveling next week. Sigh.....school begins, schedule is going to be nuts, husband traveling AND may be cut off from the wider world. Could be a rough week.

Peace.

Just read the following.......
http://www.muscatmutterings.com/2011/09/news-update-riots-in-batinah-region.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+MuscatMutterings+%28Muscat+Mutterings%29

Another blog I read out of Sohar confirmed the above. Regardless of whether or not there are riots, please read news and stay informed.

We are back!

Back in the sandbox to play for our 5th. I am also attempting to blog from my new IPad - not sure yet how well this is gonna work.

Peace.

To 'maid' or not to 'maid' that is the question....

I rolled out of bed this morning feeling pretty good. Had a wonderful evening chatting with a friend until almost midnight with a tummy full of yummy Mexican food. Truly, not a bad evening. The dirty dishes were piled everywhere, crusts from Munchkin #2's breakfast were still sitting on the counter, and a few fruit flies were frolicking in their paradise of leftover bits. There's fluffy balls of doggie fur in the corners, I still have two empty moving cartons that need to be hauled out, and there's a smorgasbord of crumbs under the table. And yet, I'd rather live in this mess or [gasp/horror/cringe] just clean it myself. I have zero desire to hire a live-in maid.

I know of a only a few mums in the four years I've been here in this region who really did have a wonderful working relationship with the women they'd hire as maids. When everyone is happy, it is awesome. But in my four years of experience, it's rare.

Now I must admit, I did have help a number of years back. I had two kids in diapers, I was working, I was going to graduate school, and the husband and I were working in separate cities maintaining both a house and a flat. I paid a fellow mum (she needed extra cash to pay for her daughter's dance lessons) to come in and help me clean the house twice a month. It was awesome. She made the extra money she needed, and I got the extra help I desperately needed.

Now, living where I live, I have friends and acquaintances constantly pressuring me into 'getting a maid'. Ok. 'Getting a maid'? It sounds like we're going out to pick up a new pet at a shelter or something. I was sitting around with a group of other mums a few week back, and they all were saying, "Oh come on! Get a maid! You'll love it!" A very good friend of mine piped up, "Sheesh you guys. You sound like a bunch of teenagers trying to pressure her into trying a joint or something." Spot on my friend - that's how I felt.

I could never afford to pay someone an actual living wage to help me clean so why would I expect another woman to come live in my little box of a 'maid's room' and work for practically nothing? (Not to mention that 'room' makes the perfect place to store all our sports gear!) People say, "Oh, having a maid is so much help!" Oh, really? So hiding their passport while you travel, locking your fridge, locking up all your jewelry, and worrying about all kinds of new things so you can 'have a maid' is just so much help? I'm not into 'keeping humans'.

I hear so many women speak about the ladies they employ as maids like these women were dogs. "You can't let her go out at night! She'll get pregnant!" "I search her room while she's gone to make sure she's not hiding anything." "I have to keep an eye on her to make sure she's cleaning like I taught her." Golly gee ladies, sounds like 'so much help' to me. You pay someone a non-living wage and then you're surprised when they steal? You control their every movement and you're surprised when the run away?

To all flies, ants and cockroaches - the buffet is laid. I don't 'have a maid'.

Peace.

Postscript - Many thanks to The Linoleum Surfer for the awesome post that was the genesis for my rant. http://thelinoleumsurfer.blogspot.com/2011/06/housemaids-declared-human.html

So ready to give the brain a break

I am so very ready to let my brain have a break. Now some of you may think that my brain is half baked most of the time anyway. But, truly folks, I'm in dire need of a holiday.

The microcosm that is my munchkins' school is an unusually tolerant place. I love the fact that my kids have friends that if they were all packed into our family room at the same time my family room would look like a miniature UN. But, I had a recent experience that left me a bit frustrated and raw. I'm hoping that by writing about it, I can finally be at peace with it.

A bit of background on me first. I own several abayas; I own a massive collection of 'head scarves'. Do I always wear these items? No, I do not. But, I have a deep respect for women who do. Why do I own these things? I own them because I have had many times living in the Middle East that they are very nice to have on hand to wear should I need to or I choose to out of respect for the culture in which I find myself. I also need to add in that I do not wish to offend or malign anyone with this post. I simply want to 'put out there' an experience I had in the hopes that somehow it can be used to improve how we teach tolerance. Now, the story....

I had the honor a while back of accompanying a group of students from our school to visit a mosque as part of their Arabic language classes. Now, another bit of explanation - Arabic language classes also teach about 'local' culture. Because we live in a predominantly Muslim country (this is the Middle East!), Islam is very much woven through everyday life here and is thus part of the 'local culture'. I am thrilled that my kids learn about religion and other cultures. If I hope to raise tolerant children, then I must see that they learn about cultures and faiths that are not our own. But, I fear that my recent experience did not teach tolerance.

The teachers had done their best to prepare the students for the visit. Please remember - these kids come from many different backgrounds and their families follow many different faiths. Upon arriving at the mosque, a number of the girls - particularly taller ones or ones who were 'physically developing' a bit early, were pulled out of our group to cover themselves more before entering the mosque. None of these girls had yet reached puberty, were modestly dressed and had their hair covered. For these girls who were singled out, it was an unpleasant experience. One, it was men who were verbally pulling them aside which even to myself - a confident grown woman - was intimidating. Second, these girls already feel 'different' because they are taller or more mature looking than their classmates. Even though the teachers had tried to prepare the students that these kinds of things may happen because a certain level of clothing is required when entering a mosque (and certain mosques in particular), we still had girls in tears. I deeply worry that these girls did not leave with an appreciation of the place they had visited. As a mum who is frequently used to herd children on field trips etc...I did what I could to comfort these girls. I tried to draw their attention to the physical beauty of the place. I asked them to try using their Arabic skills to attempt reading the writing that was incorporated into the architecture that was around them since I can only read a few Arabic letters. [I must add that our guide was impressed with the Arabic reading level of the students. Kudos to the Arabic teachers!]

I still marvel that non-Muslims are allowed in some mosques for special tours - I think it's great. If tolerance is to be taught, then 'open minds and open doors' are a very good thing. But, teaching religion is tricky. How do we teach about religion and how humans differ from one another in terms of culture without causing harm? What could have been done differently so that these girls were not in tears? I have a few thoughts/ideas that I will be sharing with next year's Arabic teachers - at least about future field trips to specific places. But, again, how do we teach tolerance? I wish I had the answer, but I am certainly looking for it.

Peace.

Squeamish? Yes.

First, I read a deeply deeply disturbing article in National Geographic this month on child brides. Please - go read it. Yes, it's horrid but only through education can this horrible practice be stopped.

Second, what is with petrol? http://af.reuters.com/article/energyOilNews/idAFLDE7560J320110607?pageNumber=1&virtualBrandChannel=0 It appears that Abu Dhabi and most of Dubai are fine, but many of the other emirates, particularly Sharjah, are running out of fuel. Loads of bloggers etc are asking, "Why?" TheNational newspaper printed in the UAE has been running excellent coverage of this if you'd like to go read.

Yes, this second topic makes me squeamish. But of course, not nearly as much as the first topic.

Peace.

International Arms Trade Treaty? Is Obama really saying no more guns?

The husband needed to make a visa trip to a local consulate so....I got to stay in my pj's this morning. Thus, I've had time to sip my morning coffee, read and write. Thanks husband! You so rock!

Politics coming your way....get ready........it may really offend you......

I read this earlier. The blog was very recently published:
http://blogs.forbes.com/larrybell/2011/06/07/u-n-agreement-should-have-all-gun-owners-up-in-arms/2/

Now, after reading Mr. Bell's article, I got to wondering, again. First, I must tell you, I smelled a whiff of this before when a story similar to this was floating around via a chain email. But, with the stench of American politics in the air (yes, I do enjoy rolling around in it...but that's another subject...), I decided to do a bit of light reading.

First, I went and read the bit published by the UN dated 26 October 2006 titled "INTERNATIONAL ARMS TRADE TREATY AIM OF DRAFT RESOLUTION

APPROVED BY DISARMAMENT COMMITTEE

Seven More Texts Recommended to General Assembly;
Comprehensive Nuclear-Test-Ban Treaty, Small Arms Among Issues Addressed" [Sorry, that didn't cut-n-paste so well.] Here's the link: http://www.un.org/News/Press/docs/2006/gadis3335.doc.htm A few things to draw your attention to. First, this was 'published' during the Bush era. Second, the US had loads of 'no way' looking type votes as part of this. For example, "The Committee also approved a draft on the illicit trade in small arms and light weapons in all its aspects by a vote of 172 in favour to 1 against (United States)." I can blog all I want about this, but you just gotta go read the whole thing for yourself to really understand it.

Ok. Next, I went and read what was being said elsewhere in the press about this. Was this old news or new news? http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=newsarchive&sid=abkyS4.975YM I found this article dated 30 October 2009. It's looking like it's old news to me. Sniff, sniff, sniff....whew? Can you smell the American politics? I better go put some old clothes on, 'cause I'm fixin' to go rollin' in it. I'm smelling that maybe Mr. Bell has a political agenda?

It was now time for me to check with some folks who love to dig around in this stuff. Have a read:
http://www.factcheck.org/2009/12/international-gun-ban-treaty/ Folks, this is old news. And further, US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is not an idiot. Former US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was not an idiot either. But, these two exceptional ladies work(ed) for presidents with very different approaches to foreign policy. In my opinion, Bush never really negotiated stuff - it was just vote 'No'. Obama, on the other hand, will 'negotiate' rather than just vote 'No'. Now, if you have ever negotiated anything in a country that is used to haggling, than you know that you stand firm but keep talking. If you just say 'No' and walk away, than you are not giving the other party a chance to 'save face' and discuss things so that they feel like they are getting a good deal. You've got to talk; you've got to listen. But, that doesn't mean you ain't gonna get what you want in the end. And, it looks so much better to the rest of the world than just voting 'No'.

This stuff is not simple. There's a reason (if you live in the States) that you were forced to study U.S. History and Government in school. It was a brave attempt to prepare you to vote, to be part of a vibrant democracy. If you are one of the ones who (to quote from FactCheck.org, "Nevertheless, a Gallup poll in October found that 41 percent of all Americans and 52 percent of gun owners believe that Obama will try to ban the sale of guns. And people are acting on these beliefs: A run on ammunition has created shortages for sport shooters, and FBI background checks, required of most would-be gun purchasers, were up 25 percent in the first five months of 2009 compared with a year earlier" than clearly you need to read more. Obama can not take away guns. He can't change the US Constitution. And, seriously, do really think really hard core gun control laws would have a prayer of passing in the current political climate in the States? Do you really think there are Democrats who would help pass hard core gun control laws? Seriously? I don't think so folks. Sniff, sniff, sniff.....

Peace.

The Ugly Side

I can't remember if I've ever written about this, but I feel it's an important story to share.

I just read an extraordinary blog post:
http://thelinoleumsurfer.blogspot.com/2011/05/arabs-got-prostitution.html Now....he says some very nasty things about more than a few places. I'm not going to nit-pick on his details, but I certainly think this is a subject few will speak openly about. I'm calling it 'the ugly side' since I don't want traffic to my blog by creeps looking for certain services.

A few years back, I was coming out of a fabulous posh 5 - star type hotel in a Middle East country. Now, this particular hotel I used to frequent quite a bit - great pool, lovely place to sit and have coffee etc......not to mention the folks who work there are absolutely tops (I helped pay for my university by working as a hotel desk clerk). Being a typical 5-star type place, it's very easy to use the valet parking. I got to know by face, and a few by name, the men who worked parking the cars and opening doors etc. These men all came from other countries - all over Africa, India and the Philippines to name a few. Well...now to the story....

I came out from the hotel one day, rather early in the morning, to collect my 'vehicle of choice'. I was chatting with one of the bellmen about how busy the hotel had been blah blah blah.....friendly small talk, when a man comes out of the hotel looking like he just rolled out of bed. He was accompanied by two women, who were dressed reasonably well, but it was pretty obvious that the women were uncomfortable in their surroundings. The women looked nervous, and their clothes were not of the best quality unlike what the typical woman guest at this hotel would wear. Each woman got in her own car (older, basic, run-down looking) and drove off - not a single good-bye said to the man. The man sauntered back into the hotel.

Well, the bellman I had been chatting with and I just looked at each other. I shook my head and said, "Never a dull moment is there? God help those poor women." And his reply to me? "God help that poor man." Yup, the bellman who probably only makes $1000 (US) a month looked at the man staying at the fancy 5-star hotel with pity.

'Classy' is not defined by the hotels you stay in and what you wear but by how you treat your fellow human beings. That morning, the bellman was the classiest guy there.

Peace.

Random difficulties

I was very proud of this cake. The first time the munchkins and I tried to make this cake mold work, we thought the cake was done and pulled it out of the oven. I pulled it out of the mold - it looked so cute and smelled so yummy. Then - the horror - the top of the bunny began spewing forth raw cake batter just like an active volcano! "Quick kids! Grab a fork! We need to eat the cooked part before it's contaminated!" Now, several tries and a year or two later, this is the best effort yet pictured here. I'm still not fab with the cake decorator, but I am proud of my 'grass' around the bunny. I also should add that everytime I make this frosting, the munchkins (especially #2) do a little happy dance in the kitchen while they lick the beaters from the mixer. (As a young child, I used to dance to the rhythm of the family's tractor - it's nice to know some of my genetic weirdness has passed to my offspring.)

The next random difficulty thing has been my mum's recent physical difficulties. The night before she and Dad were supposed to close up their official home and head for the farm (ie the cabin), she took a tumble in the kitchen breaking her ankle. The summer trip to the cabin is probably the most anticipated event of the year in our family (besides going for winter holiday). We are literally coming in from around the country, and the globe for that matter, to be together and enjoy the great outdoors (besides doing farm work of course). Mum ended up needing a steel plate put in her ankle - obviously a thing requiring surgery. I am an only child, and I love my parents deeply. I have a deep affection for and friendships with both of my parents. And where am I in the middle of all this crazy business? Sitting in my comfortable abode in the Middle East. Last night (Mum's second day in hospital), it took all my will-power to not grab my backpack and a taxi and run for the airport. I love my crazy adventursome life, but I really don't love being so far away especially a times if I think I should be 'home'. My heart is definately with my parents right now.

Next random bit....I've been reading the news about Pakistan these days. When we first came to this region of the world, I had WAY too many people ask me, "Aren't you scared?" My reply, "No, of course not. I feel safer here than I did many places back 'home'." I STILL get this question even four years on. But, four years ago when we first came to this region I told folks, "Keep your eyes open for happenings in Pakistan." So...I keep watching the newspapers. I have friends who've come here to work/live but were born in Pakistan. These friends have family and friends still there, but these friends are happier living here. I don't blame them. I'll take living in safety, thank you very much.

I'm just really really ready to hop on a plane and head 'home' for the summer. My brain is tired.

Peace.

Stuff going on

Some days, you feel like you're just sitting and watching ants running around. In the case of Munchkin #2, that's what she was doing in this snap. As I read the news, I feel like I'm watching ants. There's so much activity going on, I just can't possibly keep up with and process all of it.

There's just so much going on, and I really want to write something about all of it. But, I feel like that would not be a wise choice. So, I will maintain control over my typing fingers.

And, if it's just all way too much for you to handle, then go outside and sit and watch some ants.

Peace.

The Regulars

Meet one of 'the regulars' at our garden bird feeder. Confused? I was until I found out that these green parrots are fairly common across the Middle East. They are native to India, but spread via the pet trade. People bought them as pets, they escaped or whatever, and now there are parrots in the desert. Because of this environment, needless to say, these guys enjoy a bird bath and a feeder. Not to mention, they provide our family with hours of birdie fun. There is a cat (we call 'Tinkles') that hangs around our garden. Whenever Tinkles is in residence, the parrots all perch up on the lamp post and squawk in an attempt to make the dangerous (but cute and fluffy) predator vacate. Tinkles response is always to look up at the parrots and lick her lips while her tail gently twitches. No matter what country you live in, some things are always the same.

In thinking about 'regular' creatures, we always see signs of bears over our summer holiday. We love to be outside - hiking, kayaking, berry picking etc.... Because of where we enjoy going, we take an avid interest in bears and their habits. I came across the following story in the New York Times:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/11/science/11bears.html

Peace.

Nothing-ness

Munchkin #2 is happily making 'food' with Play-Doh in the kitchen.

Munchkin #1 is happily playing on the Wii with a friend from school in the family room.

Jesse is laying all splayed out on the nice cool carpet at my feet.

The smell of cake baking in the oven, just for the fun of it, is wafting through the house.

The floors are mopped, the counters are wiped, the laundry is done.

The peace of nothing-ness.

Ex-Pat Kids? Third Culture Kids? What to do?

I've been spending way too much time thinking about how my munchkins are growing up. There are so very many things that they are growing up not knowing about their home country, so many things that most citizens of our home country take for granted. Do I worry about this from time to time? Yes, I do.

So...what am I doing about it? What can I do about it?

First, I make certain that we spend as much time back in the home country as possible.

Second, I do my best to to have my munchkins do lots of normal/typical things kids do in our home country. For my munchkins, these normal/typical things are very much something they look forward to.

Third, my munchkins read books and spend loads of time in museums in the home country. I teach, teach, teach. Anything I can do to make our culture more real, more tangible, anything I can do to help teach the history of our country - I do it. We spend a small fortune on history books from the home country. Any time we see some bit of history about our home country in a movie, I use that opportunity to teach. Did the movie portray the history accurately? Why? Why not?

Fourth, we teach our munchkins about our family's faith. We work very hard not to criticize anyone who is different from us. We teach by example. When the munchkins ask questions, we provide thorough mature answers. Munchkins deserve to be treated like individuals with minds that can think. Munchkins are intelligent individuals, they are just adults in the making!

On the flip side, what my munchkins are learning by living here is priceless. Munchkin #2 recently finished a unit on 'explorers' and 'exploration'. For me growing up, that meant studying the men who were involved with colonial era conquest. But for Munchkin #2, that meant studying all the usual colonial era conquest men but also modern people, explorers important to countries other than European countries. She learned about the roles women have played in exploration! My munchkin #2 now knows way more about exploration than I did at her age!

My munchkins are learning Arabic. ARABIC! What an amazing opportunity. They must take Arabic in school, and just like with any of their school subjects, we expect them to work to the best of their abilities in Arabic class.

Is it tough growing up outside of the home country culture? Yes, to be sure. But....in an increasingly 'global' world, my munchkins are going to be much better prepared for the future.

Peace.

It's over, sort of.

I can't begin to describe how I felt as I drove the munchkins to school when I heard a very brief radio announcement, "Osama bin Laden has been killed." And then, the radio went straight back to the music. I phoned my parents who knew why I was calling before I even said a thing, "Yes, it appears to be true." Wow. A moment I will never forget.

I don't rejoice over the death of any human being. However, I feel so strange (in a good way) knowing that this man who caused so much death, who caused so much prejudice to Muslims because some people thought he represented Islam, this man who forever changed how people react to those living in and coming from the Middle East is now gone.

Back in the home country, I remember seeing some Muslim women wearing head scarves, and other women would look at them with curiosity. But after 9/11, when I would be out doing the shopping and would see women in head scarves, other women would look at them with distrust and fear. The horrid actions of a small group of murderers led by bin Laden changed things overnight. Now, more than ever, there is a tremendous need for dialogue between those of different faiths and different backgrounds.

So now that bin Laden is gone, why worry about dialogue and education between people of different backgrounds and faiths? My mobile was ringing like crazy yesterday with friends who are now concerned about what's next. Some of these friends are American but most come from across the globe. But they are all concerned about 'what's next'. Their fears are honest and real. Do I fear? No, not really. There's just no point in wasting the energy. If I was really going to spend energy being fearful, than I'd move to some nice wooded place in the middle of 'no-where' (I kind of like the idea of Sweden - snow, good hiking) and live the life of a hermit. But rather than being fearful, I can do my best to be part of the dialogue. I can do my best to spread love and caring rather than hate.

So, it's over but only sort of.

Peace.

As a post-script: http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,2068945_2271220,00.html Some U.S. based news sites are referring to bin Laden's hide-out as a 'mansion'. Yes, this is a big compound, but I would not use the American term of 'mansion' to describe it. But, it is still far from rough-living in a cave in a mountainside some where.

Still having a very good laugh and Third Culture Kids

Ok. You just gotta go see this if you have not yet - I'm still laughing about it days later:
http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com/2011/04/sign-of-day.html Again, many many thanks for posting this picture!

The husband (and the munchkins) worked up a better translation which comes out kind of like 'butchered poultry'. I like the translation on the sign much better!

Well, the husband is off on a business trip to the home country. He went with one suitcase of business clothing and one empty suitcase to fill. Needless to say, the munchkins and I sent him with a shopping list! While driving the munchkins to school this morning, the husband happily phoned us. Thanks to the joy of the speaker phone, the husband proudly proclaimed that he's bringing munchkin #2 a box of 150 crayons (very hard to get and expensive here) and he's bringing munchkin #1 a number of books in his favorite series. There were big smiles and happy eyes in the vehicle this morning!

Which brings me to my main point: we are different. My munchkins are very happy over craft supplies and books. The response would not have been any different had the husband said "Ipod" or "video game". I have days I wonder how much of this 'differentness' is because of parenting/family values or that my munchkins are becoming 'Third Culture Kids.

I've been reading the book Third Culture Kids by David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken. It's been a very interesting read so far. So what's a third culture kid or TCK as the book says? Let me quote from p.13:

"A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK
frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having
full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture may be
assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sens of belonging is in
relationship to others of similar background."

When we made the decision as parents to move our family outside of our home country, we really didn't know what we were in for. We thought we'd be gone a couple of years. It's been four now, and it's likely to be more. I'm glad my kids are growing up comfortable traveling the globe. But, I do worry that they could have a hard time adjusting to life back in the home country when the time comes. So what are we doing to help with the eventual readjustment?

Well, we have a family home/farm in the home country. The house is new but the land has been in the family for a lengthy time now. The kids' beds, toys, other furniture is all in the new farm house. We spend winter breaks and summer holidays in that house. It is tempting to spend holidays in more exotic places (closer to where we currently reside), but having that time in the home country is precious and priceless.

The munchkins go to summer camp in the home country. Yes, summer camp is fun, but it also provides the munchkins with time around kids their own age from the home country. Really really important in my not so humble opinion!

We work very hard as parents to 'keep it real.' The munchkins are exposed to 5-star hotels, fancy restaurants, and live-in help, but we remind them that these are special situations and are not the usual thing for our family. We don't have any staff in our home. The munchkins are expected to do chores. Doing chores is the only way the munchkins can earn money to spend on toys/games etc in the home country. No chores = no money. We drive comfortable vehicles but nothing 'luxury' - my vehicle in the home country is probably nicer. This was a conscious choice. We remind the munchkins that the company is paying for many things which is what makes our current living standard possible. We explain to the munchkins that when they go to university, life will be books and a basic standard of living. And, that basic standard of living will continue for a number of years after they finish university.

Keep it real.

Peace.

The Chaos continues?

I just read that the Statess and the Britain have told all 'non-essential' folks to leave Syria. Wow. When we first moved to this region, our next door neighbors were from Syria. They were actually citizens of a 'western' country, but they were originally from Syria. They were lovely friendly neighbors. The 'lady of the house' and I shared a number of cups of coffee and good conversation about the faith of her family. Oh yes, and, they were/are Christian. They were the first Christian Arabs I had met.

Here's a link to an interesting read on CNN:
http://www.cnn.com/2011/WORLD/meast/04/25/syria.role/index.html?eref=rss_topstories&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+rss%2Fcnn_topstories+%28RSS%3A+Top+Stories%29&utm_content=My+Yahoo

Instead of chaos, I hope for peace.

Peace.

A beautiful quiet day

I love long weekends. The munchkins ended up with an extra day off this week (yippee!). To start things off, we had wonderful friends over last night for dinner, excellent conversation, and swimming. The husband and I stayed up very late playing 'Monopoly' with our munchkins.

This morning, we all slept in. The husband put up our new garden gate/trellis thing. It goes over and across the garden gate - looks really pretty. Tinkles the cat came by for a visit, and the munchkins have been very busy with seasonal edible 'crafts'.

Now, as I sit here typing this, I'm watching birds at the feeder, the husband is having a nap here on the living room rug, and I can hear the munchkins laughing upstairs as they play and watch an old movie.

To continue the vegetative state....here are some fun video links.....
http://money.cnn.com/video/smallbusiness/2010/12/09/sbiz_hwgs_jim_henson_co.cnnmoney/ A brief history of the Jim Henson Company.

http://money.cnn.com/video/smallbusiness/2011/04/21/smb_hwgs_peeps.cnnmoney/ A history of the company that makes one of our family's all-time favorite sweets - Peeps. But....I think they are impossible to get outside of the States. If I have a friend going to/from the States, I always ask them to bring us Peeps!

I hope your day is filled with peace.

Out of petrol?

Before I write/talk about petrol....I'm reading all I can on the calm now in Bahrain, and I'm reading all I can on the events in Yemen.

I was reading the news this morning....and I still can't believe what I'm reading.....
http://gulfnews.com/business/oil-gas/emarat-pumps-running-out-of-petrol-1.682789
http://arabnews.com/economy/article140261.ece

I do need to add, that after doing some reading around etc...there is still petrol in the UAE! There is certainly no reason to panic or anything if you live there! I just find this a fascinating look at life in the Middle East.

A bit of 'background' info - not all of the UAE has loads of oil. Different parts of the country make money different ways - from what I can tell. For example (very simplified!) - Abu Dhabi has loads of oil and some tourism. Dubai has lots of tourism, and finance stuff, and a little oil. I believe one emirate has a large manufacturing facility for ceramics (not kitch but good useful stuff). And, I think my favourite biscuits (cookies to you U.S. folks) are made in the emirate of Sharjah. Yummy, and they are a very good price.

Saudi Arabia (I think) has some of the cheapest petrol around. Oman is still fairly cheap, and from what I'm reading, the UAE's petrol prices are higher than Saudi's and Oman's. Now, please keep in mind (those of you reading this from the States or Europe), that the UAE's 'higher' price is approximately $1.80 (U.S.) per gallon. That's right, $1.80/gallon (yeah, sounds cheap to me too).

I read through the comments people are making on this article on Gulf News. I'm totally blown away that folks are complaining about gas prices and that they 'might go up'. Yes, Saudi's petrol and Oman's petrol may be cheaper by comparison, but if oil prices are rising, then yes (at least across much of the world), gas prices are going to rise as well.

IF you are an expat living in the Middle East, than chances are that somehow your work is related to the oil industry. In my opinion, just about everything here is touched by the oil industry in some form or another. So...if you're an expat in this region....well.....if you know me you know what I'm thinking. If you don't know me....don't use your imagination. Just stop reading this blog.

I think I better go walk the dog and then sit and watch birds in my garden.

Peace.

Death to Bacteria! and other weirdness

It's been a weird week. And, naturally, the husband has been VERY busy with work in the middle of the weird week. No sarcasm intended, the sweet man has been swamped - poor guy. First, we've had actual rain with thunder and lightening. Unless you have lived in a desert, you won't 'get' this. But for us desert dwellers, it was beyond cool. Second, Munchkin #2 has had strep throat. Now, as a mom, it's horrid seeing your kid suffer. So, I've been on a 'death to bacteria' campaign. The kitchen is scrubbed, the bathrooms are scrubbed, new toothbrush for Munchkin #2, and EVERYTHING we use for eating/drinking is going through the dishwasher. Now, part of the 'weird' with this....I can just walk into a pharmacy without a prescription and get antibiotics. Of course, we go to the doc first since we're not irresponsible. But, I know there are others who are not responsible. When we get the antibiotics, it's a powder that I have to mix with a certain volume of liquid on my own. In the home country, this is unheard of since you don't want a parent accidentally doing this wrong! Of course Munchkin #2 couldn't keep that nasty mess down, so she's learning how to swallow tablets. Also, a nasty business since the tablets here are not 'sugar coated.' Yuck. Poor kid. Third, it seems we have been adopted by a little kitty. We're calling her 'Tinkles'. She wears an ancient looking collar with a little bell on it. She's very sweet and very skinny. Rumour has it that the folks who previously lived in our villa abandoned a little kitty when they left. Since Tinkles keeps trying to come in the back door, I'm thinking the rumour is true. We're feeding her and giving her fresh water. If she continues to hang around, we'll take her to the vet and get her checked out and fixed up, so to speak. The sweet kitty loves sitting in Munchkin #1's lap out in the grass. Peace.

Grab the duvet

Thanks to the typical weather changes this time of the year, it's dark/overcast outside. And the brilliant bit? It's not dust but real clouds. Even though it's not cold outside, this kind of weather really makes me want to grab the duvet off my bed and curl up with a coffee and a movie or good book. I've been doing lots of reading today (on-line newspapers). Wow, there's loads of stuff going on. There's interesting stuff from the last 24 hours at Reuters and CNN. As a mum, I have always tried to teach my children to use words to solve problems as opposed to using fists. It is amazing how powerful words can be. Words can be used to bring joy through a great novel, happiness and love in a marriage proposal, sadness in an insult. As humans, our need for use of language is deep. Babies begin to absorb language basically from birth. As a young teenager, I loved joining in debates in my history classes. I would spend hours in the library preparing my facts for my team's side of the debate. It was exhilarating to exchange ideas and facts. It felt really good to have a proper forum for speaking out on various issues. All these years later, I'm still grateful to my history teacher, Mr. R., for allowing us those opportunities. Maybe after I clean the floors, go buy groceries, and do the laundry I will grab that duvet. Peace.

To Eat or Not to Eat....

The husband was hanging up some new window blinds/coverings/draperies this evening. The blinds came with a little zippered baggie of parts (screws, brackets, etc...). The outside of the baggies of parts said, "Do Not Eat." Yup, this is an interesting place many times. Peace.

Gripe, gripe, gripe....

I can not believe how folks are grumping and complaining about President Obama. He's too war-like; he's not war-like enough. Totally amazing. Ok my readers in the States.....coming at you - the only way the whole Libya no-fly zone thing is happening is because the States are part of a true coalition. YOU CAN NOT go guns blazing into an Arab country without Arab backing. Period. Full-stop. End of story. The U.S. can not go it alone. President Obama does have a foreign policy, and it is to actually work WITH other countries. Wow! Real diplomacy! Imagine that! Ok, enough gripe gripe on that one. On to other news.... If you are traveling around Sohar, Oman, the word is that you need to have identification on you and allow extra time to have your vehicle searched. For those of you who don't 'know' Oman, many people traveling from the UAE into Muscat via car drive through Sohar. If you're in oil/shipping/maritime industries in the region, there's a good chance you've at least driven through Sohar. So....so much for a lovely spring holiday traveling the coast of Oman enjoying the lovely old forts/castles along the way. Not to mention the beautiful snorkeling. Sigh.... http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com/2011/04/have-your-id-handy.html I wish I could get the munchkins to take the husband up on his offer of a few days in Mumbai, India this week. I mean really...5 star hotel that's paid for (we pay any extra cost for wife/kids etc of course)? But, the munchkins are very concerned about repeating the tale of mum very ill for a week after attending a wedding in Pune, India. So, today's big adventure shall be purchasing a new DVD since it's cheaper than going to see a moving in the theatre. Thrills galore..... [sarcasm is going drip drip drip]. And last but not least... We bought Munchkin #1 a beautiful new bicycle last night. He rode it as soon as he got it home. And, he ate breakfast this morning and was out the door with the bike. Awesome. On the flip side, we tried to also purchase Munchkin #2 a trampoline, but no one currently has them in stock. Sigh.... Last gripe of the day (or maybe a pondering).... Sitting here in my kitchen, I can see my neighbors' back garden. They've got 3 gardeners working, a maid, I've seen at least one driver, and maybe a second maid? How much help does one married couple need? Maybe I should head to the garden shop to buy some new flowers. Actually, I think I'll do some laundry. Putting stuff in my gigantic 'vented' dryer along with a fabric softener sheet really does brighten my mood. Gotta love big U.S. made/style appliances. I'll take a good U.S. vented dryer any day over a maid. Peace.

I'm back....

Well, the munchkins are off on 'between terms' break. And, we just got our internet hooked back up! Hooray!!!! Just when I thought the world was quieting down.... http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com/ There was info in the regional press about Sohar. It just really freaked me out because I've been through Sohar a number of times. We had been hoping to spend some of our holiday in Muscat, but we're staying home. In addition (and not really related), the husband made the offer that we travel with him to Mumbai this week (he's going on business), but the munchkins declined. They didn't really want to spend time with mum while she shops in India. Peace.

Summer is on the way and things are heating up

First, I'd like to direct you to give this post a read:
http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com/2011/03/tale-of-two-roundabouts.html? I am hoping that the two round-abouts is not an indication of negativity to come. Great blog. Many many thanks for your work. It is very much appreciated.

In the 'Dan and Jillian' blog, "Once the heat returns, how many of these protesters will be left?" Rather insightful. I hope that the horrid heat in the region, does help to calm things down.

I read the New York Times this morning. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/03/16/world/middleeast/16bahrain.html?pagewanted=1&ref=world Even though Bahrain is a major 'home' to the U.S. Navy, I don't really think there's much the States can do to help the situation. Granted, I don't know a thing about diplomacy but....it's an Arab country. Anytime the States meddles in an Arab country, it feels like people get angry and the situation gets worse. It is going to be very interesting to watch what happens now that other GCC countries are involved. The crazy question that I'd like to ask in all this....some countries are suggesting to their citizens to leave Bahrain. How can they? Can they get to the airport? Can they drive across into Saudi? I don't know. It just feels like once these types of notices come out from consulates, it is going to be difficult to leave.

So...thinking along those lines....what do you do as an ex-pat to prepare for an emergency? Hmmmmm... Here's my personal list....
1. Have cash on hand - local currency and 'hard currency' like dollars or euros.
2. Never let your gas tank get so low that you can't drive to the airport.
3. Keep a mental list (or written) of what to grab in case an airport run is necessary. For me, that's my laptop, a couple of photographs of my munchkins, printed copies of school records for the munchkins, and other important family documents.
4. Always keep a week's worth of food and water on-hand. Water gets tricky, but I always keep bottles stashed in my kitchen, just in case.
5. Maintain an international calling plan mobile phone based in your home country - a mobile that works in any country. Pricey? Yes, but only if you use it. And, it could be an important life-line.

Here's to hoping only the weather heats up more.

Peace.

Latest and greatest....maybe [Warning: loads of opinion]

More than anything, these types of posts are so my mum and dad can read what I'm reading. I have other family members who like to read what I read. Blogging is just way easier than putting together a bunch of emails.

http://muscatconfidential.blogspot.com/2011/03/things-start-to-get-out-of-hand-in-oman.html A highly opinionated piece.

Just heard on the BBC that the U.S. had 'no warning' that troops (BCC says 'Saudi') were going to go into Bahrain. Give me a break. It's common chatter amongst ex-patriots that eventually this would happen. If I'VE heard people talking about this then..... well, anyhow.... Long-term ex-pats have always been a bit concerned about Bahrain (my opinion).

http://gulfnews.com/news/gulf/bahrain/gcc-forces-in-bahrain-to-help-restore-order-1.777144

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/03/15/world/middleeast/15saudi.html?hp

http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2011/03/14/how-stable-is-saudi-arabia/what-makes-the-kingdom-different

The husband wanted to do some business travel this week. I told him, "NO WAY! We're in the middle of moving house AND there's a bunch of mess in the region. NO WAY!"

Time to get back to packing boxes and bags.

Peace.