Random difficulties

I was very proud of this cake. The first time the munchkins and I tried to make this cake mold work, we thought the cake was done and pulled it out of the oven. I pulled it out of the mold - it looked so cute and smelled so yummy. Then - the horror - the top of the bunny began spewing forth raw cake batter just like an active volcano! "Quick kids! Grab a fork! We need to eat the cooked part before it's contaminated!" Now, several tries and a year or two later, this is the best effort yet pictured here. I'm still not fab with the cake decorator, but I am proud of my 'grass' around the bunny. I also should add that everytime I make this frosting, the munchkins (especially #2) do a little happy dance in the kitchen while they lick the beaters from the mixer. (As a young child, I used to dance to the rhythm of the family's tractor - it's nice to know some of my genetic weirdness has passed to my offspring.)

The next random difficulty thing has been my mum's recent physical difficulties. The night before she and Dad were supposed to close up their official home and head for the farm (ie the cabin), she took a tumble in the kitchen breaking her ankle. The summer trip to the cabin is probably the most anticipated event of the year in our family (besides going for winter holiday). We are literally coming in from around the country, and the globe for that matter, to be together and enjoy the great outdoors (besides doing farm work of course). Mum ended up needing a steel plate put in her ankle - obviously a thing requiring surgery. I am an only child, and I love my parents deeply. I have a deep affection for and friendships with both of my parents. And where am I in the middle of all this crazy business? Sitting in my comfortable abode in the Middle East. Last night (Mum's second day in hospital), it took all my will-power to not grab my backpack and a taxi and run for the airport. I love my crazy adventursome life, but I really don't love being so far away especially a times if I think I should be 'home'. My heart is definately with my parents right now.

Next random bit....I've been reading the news about Pakistan these days. When we first came to this region of the world, I had WAY too many people ask me, "Aren't you scared?" My reply, "No, of course not. I feel safer here than I did many places back 'home'." I STILL get this question even four years on. But, four years ago when we first came to this region I told folks, "Keep your eyes open for happenings in Pakistan." So...I keep watching the newspapers. I have friends who've come here to work/live but were born in Pakistan. These friends have family and friends still there, but these friends are happier living here. I don't blame them. I'll take living in safety, thank you very much.

I'm just really really ready to hop on a plane and head 'home' for the summer. My brain is tired.

Peace.

Stuff going on

Some days, you feel like you're just sitting and watching ants running around. In the case of Munchkin #2, that's what she was doing in this snap. As I read the news, I feel like I'm watching ants. There's so much activity going on, I just can't possibly keep up with and process all of it.

There's just so much going on, and I really want to write something about all of it. But, I feel like that would not be a wise choice. So, I will maintain control over my typing fingers.

And, if it's just all way too much for you to handle, then go outside and sit and watch some ants.

Peace.

The Regulars

Meet one of 'the regulars' at our garden bird feeder. Confused? I was until I found out that these green parrots are fairly common across the Middle East. They are native to India, but spread via the pet trade. People bought them as pets, they escaped or whatever, and now there are parrots in the desert. Because of this environment, needless to say, these guys enjoy a bird bath and a feeder. Not to mention, they provide our family with hours of birdie fun. There is a cat (we call 'Tinkles') that hangs around our garden. Whenever Tinkles is in residence, the parrots all perch up on the lamp post and squawk in an attempt to make the dangerous (but cute and fluffy) predator vacate. Tinkles response is always to look up at the parrots and lick her lips while her tail gently twitches. No matter what country you live in, some things are always the same.

In thinking about 'regular' creatures, we always see signs of bears over our summer holiday. We love to be outside - hiking, kayaking, berry picking etc.... Because of where we enjoy going, we take an avid interest in bears and their habits. I came across the following story in the New York Times:
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/11/science/11bears.html

Peace.

Nothing-ness

Munchkin #2 is happily making 'food' with Play-Doh in the kitchen.

Munchkin #1 is happily playing on the Wii with a friend from school in the family room.

Jesse is laying all splayed out on the nice cool carpet at my feet.

The smell of cake baking in the oven, just for the fun of it, is wafting through the house.

The floors are mopped, the counters are wiped, the laundry is done.

The peace of nothing-ness.

Ex-Pat Kids? Third Culture Kids? What to do?

I've been spending way too much time thinking about how my munchkins are growing up. There are so very many things that they are growing up not knowing about their home country, so many things that most citizens of our home country take for granted. Do I worry about this from time to time? Yes, I do.

So...what am I doing about it? What can I do about it?

First, I make certain that we spend as much time back in the home country as possible.

Second, I do my best to to have my munchkins do lots of normal/typical things kids do in our home country. For my munchkins, these normal/typical things are very much something they look forward to.

Third, my munchkins read books and spend loads of time in museums in the home country. I teach, teach, teach. Anything I can do to make our culture more real, more tangible, anything I can do to help teach the history of our country - I do it. We spend a small fortune on history books from the home country. Any time we see some bit of history about our home country in a movie, I use that opportunity to teach. Did the movie portray the history accurately? Why? Why not?

Fourth, we teach our munchkins about our family's faith. We work very hard not to criticize anyone who is different from us. We teach by example. When the munchkins ask questions, we provide thorough mature answers. Munchkins deserve to be treated like individuals with minds that can think. Munchkins are intelligent individuals, they are just adults in the making!

On the flip side, what my munchkins are learning by living here is priceless. Munchkin #2 recently finished a unit on 'explorers' and 'exploration'. For me growing up, that meant studying the men who were involved with colonial era conquest. But for Munchkin #2, that meant studying all the usual colonial era conquest men but also modern people, explorers important to countries other than European countries. She learned about the roles women have played in exploration! My munchkin #2 now knows way more about exploration than I did at her age!

My munchkins are learning Arabic. ARABIC! What an amazing opportunity. They must take Arabic in school, and just like with any of their school subjects, we expect them to work to the best of their abilities in Arabic class.

Is it tough growing up outside of the home country culture? Yes, to be sure. But....in an increasingly 'global' world, my munchkins are going to be much better prepared for the future.

Peace.

It's over, sort of.

I can't begin to describe how I felt as I drove the munchkins to school when I heard a very brief radio announcement, "Osama bin Laden has been killed." And then, the radio went straight back to the music. I phoned my parents who knew why I was calling before I even said a thing, "Yes, it appears to be true." Wow. A moment I will never forget.

I don't rejoice over the death of any human being. However, I feel so strange (in a good way) knowing that this man who caused so much death, who caused so much prejudice to Muslims because some people thought he represented Islam, this man who forever changed how people react to those living in and coming from the Middle East is now gone.

Back in the home country, I remember seeing some Muslim women wearing head scarves, and other women would look at them with curiosity. But after 9/11, when I would be out doing the shopping and would see women in head scarves, other women would look at them with distrust and fear. The horrid actions of a small group of murderers led by bin Laden changed things overnight. Now, more than ever, there is a tremendous need for dialogue between those of different faiths and different backgrounds.

So now that bin Laden is gone, why worry about dialogue and education between people of different backgrounds and faiths? My mobile was ringing like crazy yesterday with friends who are now concerned about what's next. Some of these friends are American but most come from across the globe. But they are all concerned about 'what's next'. Their fears are honest and real. Do I fear? No, not really. There's just no point in wasting the energy. If I was really going to spend energy being fearful, than I'd move to some nice wooded place in the middle of 'no-where' (I kind of like the idea of Sweden - snow, good hiking) and live the life of a hermit. But rather than being fearful, I can do my best to be part of the dialogue. I can do my best to spread love and caring rather than hate.

So, it's over but only sort of.

Peace.

As a post-script: http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,2068945_2271220,00.html Some U.S. based news sites are referring to bin Laden's hide-out as a 'mansion'. Yes, this is a big compound, but I would not use the American term of 'mansion' to describe it. But, it is still far from rough-living in a cave in a mountainside some where.

Still having a very good laugh and Third Culture Kids

Ok. You just gotta go see this if you have not yet - I'm still laughing about it days later:
http://danandjillian3.blogspot.com/2011/04/sign-of-day.html Again, many many thanks for posting this picture!

The husband (and the munchkins) worked up a better translation which comes out kind of like 'butchered poultry'. I like the translation on the sign much better!

Well, the husband is off on a business trip to the home country. He went with one suitcase of business clothing and one empty suitcase to fill. Needless to say, the munchkins and I sent him with a shopping list! While driving the munchkins to school this morning, the husband happily phoned us. Thanks to the joy of the speaker phone, the husband proudly proclaimed that he's bringing munchkin #2 a box of 150 crayons (very hard to get and expensive here) and he's bringing munchkin #1 a number of books in his favorite series. There were big smiles and happy eyes in the vehicle this morning!

Which brings me to my main point: we are different. My munchkins are very happy over craft supplies and books. The response would not have been any different had the husband said "Ipod" or "video game". I have days I wonder how much of this 'differentness' is because of parenting/family values or that my munchkins are becoming 'Third Culture Kids.

I've been reading the book Third Culture Kids by David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken. It's been a very interesting read so far. So what's a third culture kid or TCK as the book says? Let me quote from p.13:

"A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK
frequently builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having
full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture may be
assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sens of belonging is in
relationship to others of similar background."

When we made the decision as parents to move our family outside of our home country, we really didn't know what we were in for. We thought we'd be gone a couple of years. It's been four now, and it's likely to be more. I'm glad my kids are growing up comfortable traveling the globe. But, I do worry that they could have a hard time adjusting to life back in the home country when the time comes. So what are we doing to help with the eventual readjustment?

Well, we have a family home/farm in the home country. The house is new but the land has been in the family for a lengthy time now. The kids' beds, toys, other furniture is all in the new farm house. We spend winter breaks and summer holidays in that house. It is tempting to spend holidays in more exotic places (closer to where we currently reside), but having that time in the home country is precious and priceless.

The munchkins go to summer camp in the home country. Yes, summer camp is fun, but it also provides the munchkins with time around kids their own age from the home country. Really really important in my not so humble opinion!

We work very hard as parents to 'keep it real.' The munchkins are exposed to 5-star hotels, fancy restaurants, and live-in help, but we remind them that these are special situations and are not the usual thing for our family. We don't have any staff in our home. The munchkins are expected to do chores. Doing chores is the only way the munchkins can earn money to spend on toys/games etc in the home country. No chores = no money. We drive comfortable vehicles but nothing 'luxury' - my vehicle in the home country is probably nicer. This was a conscious choice. We remind the munchkins that the company is paying for many things which is what makes our current living standard possible. We explain to the munchkins that when they go to university, life will be books and a basic standard of living. And, that basic standard of living will continue for a number of years after they finish university.

Keep it real.

Peace.