Juvenile RA - 'the flare'

Well, Munchkin #2 is officially having a 'flare'.  Last night was two heat pack and one ice pack night.  She willingly/without being told, took 500mg of naproxen.  This morning, she woke up crying. Suddenly the disease has ramped up.  It was pain in her left ankle, wrist and knee, and pain in both shoulders.  Went into the rheumatologist today, found fluid in both left wrist and left knee.  So....she goes back up to 10mg of Methotrexate once a week. And, the doc in the home country was emailed. 

So very frustrating to see her go through this.  She has quit sleeping in her loft.  She made a bedsheet tent on her floor and sleeps on a camping pad.  We're going to buy her a different bed and turn the loft into a sitting area.  She LOVES sleeping on her floor.  I think climbing down in the morning is too hard.

Must say, Munchkin #1 has been amazing.  Does dishes, takes care of pets, helps in the mornings since Munchkin #2 is having a hard time with morning stiffness and pain. 

It will be ok, but days like today make me wish I was 'home'.  Husband is on the road, and I'm fighting a bad cold.  Not fun.  Ex-pat life is good, but it certainly has its lonely moments.  I am so thankful for my friends here and my place of prayer or I'd never make it.  Oh yeah, and so thankful for my dog Jesse. Wagging tail and warm brown eyes really helps.

Peace.

Women wearing trousers

I just watched a movie this morning with Munchkin #2 - "Impromptu".  We watched it because it starred Hugh Grant, but he wasn't really on screen a lot.  But, it introduced me to the writer 'George Sand'.  'George' was actually not her real name.  Her real names were Lucile Aurore Dupin and Baroness Dudevant.  She was from 'high society' but divorced her husband and wore men's clothing in public.  By 'donning trousers', she was able to roam more freely and hang out in places not considered suitable for a woman - or at least a 'proper woman'.  Cool.  {BTW for anybody who cares - I am not encouraging cross dressing in places where it is illegal. I am not encouraging 'cross dressing' ,simply saying that I understand the whole shunning dresses thing.}

As a kid, I always had to wear a dress or skirt to our family's preferred place of prayer.  It was just not really appropriate to wear trousers/slacks/pants.  (As a university student, I wore a very nice blazer and blue jeans one time to this place on a trip home, and ladies asked me if I had left all my dresses in my dormitory.) My mother and I would spend a lot of time combing sale racks for appropriate yet affordable clothes for me to wear there each week. My favorite was made by Gunne Sax.  It was a slate blue with a plunging neckline, simple collar, tea length, princess waist and like 40 buttons all down the front.  It was cotton, washable and very very comfortable.  I wore it for my high school graduation photos, and I'm wearing it in the portrait that was drawn of myself and the husband when we got married as a gift from my Aunt J.  I was raised around and in dresses.  By university, I was changing my attitude towards them.

But, totally awesome amazing dress aside, I now tend to prefer trousers/pants/jeans.  I feel more able to 'be me' in blue jeans.  If I do wear a dress or skirt, it is usually paired with a nice pair of boots.  Munchkin #2 only owns a couple, and she never wears them. 

For me, I have times that I tend to think of dresses as froofy and silly.  We women spend way too much time trying to find ones we like, that we can afford, and that fit. I recently had a big party/event to attend with the husband.  I wore black trousers, comfortable high heels that are now so old only my bad glue job is holding them together, and a fancy sequined covered top.  I had a blast at the event.  No worries about straps slipping off shoulders, no worries about bending over and showing parts I don't ever want to show.  I just danced and danced. 

I tend to feel more free, stronger when I'm wearing blue jeans.  I have no idea why.  But I do know that I would have been very interested in meeting 'George Sand' if I had a time machine.

Peace.

Evil

I have many days that I wonder 'Why?' when I think about evil in the world.  Why do some kids have to get sick? Why do bad things happen to good people? I could write pages and pages of theological stuff, and stuff based on my religious faith discussing evil, but I'm not going to. For the simple reason that some days it still doesn't make you feel better to believe that you 'know' the answer to 'why?'.

Living in this region, one has to be very careful who and how one compliments.  You see many blue glass eyes for sale for warding off the 'evil eye'.  I have close girlfriends who wear glass blue eyes on their bracelets.  I think it is mostly as a fashion statement within my circle of friends, but for many here it is to ward off evil. 

Here's a great blog post from an Omani blogger on the subject.  She's does a much better job of explaining this than I can.
http://susanalshahri.blogspot.com/2012/04/evil-eye.html

I feel that when we humans do things like wear things or hang things up to ward off evil, we are trying to control what we cannot control.  We have a desperate need to feel that we are doing something.  There is an old Calvin and Hobbes cartoon where Calvin is standing outside looking up at a star filled night sky.  Calvin proclaims, "I AM SIGNIFICANT! ....screams the speck of dust."  But, for many, and for those of  us who are people of faith, I know that I AM significant.

A different twist on this discussion is the recent news coming out of S.A. The report is that a woman was arrested in a shopping mall (?) and is being held on suspicion of casting a spell.  I believe the report was originally brought to light in the West by Reuters.  The Chicago Tribune picked up the story and has it published on their website.

How do we as parents deal with the sadness, the horror, of having a child fall ill?  When my munchkin #2 is in pain, when she is frustrated by headaches and joint pain, I ask 'why her?'.  When good friends, loved ones fall ill with some horrific disease, I want to cry out, 'Why?'.  Again, I could type tons and tons of theological stuff.  But, it would come up short.  My comfort comes not through my own words but through my faith.

Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.

Peace.

The Crazy Mixed-Up Ex-Pat Life

Well....just found out that a good friend of mine here is moving back to her home country this summer.  What a total bummer.  But, I am happy for her.  I have a number of days I ask myself, "What on earth were you thinking leaving such a comfy life?" 

Our landlord here is playing landlord games. "I am going to sell the property."  Never mind that we have to live here through that process if that's what he decides to do.  What I think is actually going on is that he wants to raise our rent.  Fine. But really, could you just talk with us about it?  No, of course not. It is way more the 'norm' to play this idiotic games. 

Munchkin #2 has had a low grade fever and really bad cough the past few days which has triggered some of her asthma symptoms (like wheezing). The doc put her on antibiotics, but good quality expectorant is not available here. So frustrating.  And because of the asthma, I can't put her in a warm bath with 'goo clearing' aromatic stuff. 

School calendar stuff....rumour alert!  Rumour alert!  We thought that since our school's calendar has been 'published' and 'accepted' it would be set in stone so to speak.  Well, there were other calendar things published that really just didn't seem right that changed what was already 'set in stone'.  Now.....rumour alert, rumour alert.....a mum buddy of mine at a different school said that the publishings were 'in error' and that different folks/groups are blaming each other for the reporting 'error'.  Whew....I hope my buddy is right.  Nothing like buying plane tickets and setting your holiday schedule only to have it changed.  I feel like I live in a giant rumour mill.  Here's hoping for accurate information.

The husband is soon off on a business trip that will take him to the home country. I am so jealous. As the weather begins to warm up here, I start to really get hit with the homesickness kind of stuff.  I am ready for green trees, green grass, a beautiful cool lake, and a comfortable basement/lower level to curl up in at night while I watch movies with my kids.

Peace.

Rheumatoid Arthritis, Headaches and difficult docs

Well, where do I even begin?

Ok, we live in the Middle East. For those who are not from this region, medical care here can feel very foreign and frightening. For instance, I recently had to have my foot x-rayed because of a possible hair line fracture (it's fine now, btw). The technician wasn't wearing a radiation badge (shows if technician is getting too much exposure), the doctor, nurses and x-ray technician NEVER asked if I was pregnant (NOT safe), and the pillow/paper on the x-ray table wasn't being changed between patients. Patients need to be educated!

As you know if you read this blog regularly, my Munchkin #2 has Rheumatoid Arthritis. She has had headaches off and on (kinda like her joint pains) since she was around 8 or 9 years old. But now, her headaches are becoming much more severe and difficult to deal with. She had to leave her sport of choice an hour early last night because of the pain, she was sweating profusely last night with no fever and had some pain in the lower back of her head in addition to the 'regular' headache.

The rheumatologist has lowered her methotrexate dosage (I don't think it's the m.t.x), and a neurologist has put her on cyproheptadine and has her keeping a headache journal. What's frustrating to me is that the docs just don't seem to have a clue. The neuro wasn't interested in hearing about her dizziness or sweats. In the mean time, I'm having to drag the poor kid through crazy crowded medical centres, push and shove around to get meds because people don't 'que' well here, and pay massive amounts of cash out before our insurance will reimburse us. Yes, I am extraordinarily thankful we have health insurance. But, this has all been so very stressful that I am strongly considering hiring a lady to help me clean house because I feel like I'm 'drowning'. {Little pink piggies flying!} But, trying to pay for the extra help would probably only add to my stress at the end of the day.

In the mean time, I am day dreaming of our next snorkeling trip (a great little island close by - awesome with the kayak. Maybe we need to buy a second kayak? Hmmmm.....). I'm thinking it may be time to burn some of those frequent guest hotel points.

Peace.

Does clothing make the woman?

I gotta make this quick. My parents are here visiting and we are having an awesome time!

Just read this in the New York Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/03/science/clothes-and-self-perception.html?em&exprod=myyahoo

So, if we perceive ourselves by our clothing...what does that say about me that I like to go roaming around in my tight ripped up blue jeans, my 'cowboy' boots which are always loaded with dust, a slightly pricey shirt of some sort, and my hair pulled back? Tough, ready to work, but still a girl? Also is interesting to think about in terms of different countries' 'national dress'. How does a person feel when they wear their 'national dress'? For me, I feel very comfortable and happy when I'm wearing my 'national dress'. It also is interesting in terms of when I go out shopping and buy some great new piece of clothing in a store I perceive as being 'cool', I feel really good about myself when I wear that piece.

Really really thought provoking for me...... So how does someone feel wearing a designer shirt bought in a designer store versus wearing the exact same designer shirt bought at a second hand sale? Do they still get the same 'cool' feeling? Can clothes impart confidence?

I feel confident when I'm wearing my dusty cowboy boots. Or is it just because my feet are comfortable and I can't feel sand crunching between my toes?

Peace.