Meds Change and thinking about other changes

 

First off, if any of my readers has comments on any of my posts, I now have opened the comments section. But, if comments or questions are not respectful, I will simply delete them.

This snap was from a recent snorkeling trip.

Well, it has finally happened.  Munchkin #2 was sent home from school this last week with a bad tummy ache.  As the school nurse put it, "She looked green."  The oral methotrexate my daughter takes for her rheumatoid arthritis was really bothering her stomach.

Since we can't have her missing school each week, the doc we've been using here who's an 'adult' doc, finally is letting Munchkin #2 try the injectable methotrexate. Never have I seen a kid actually excited about getting a jab each week. Munchkin #2 was actually excited.

Munchkin #2 has been back at her sports, but she's not as tip top feeling as she would like to be. We're all hoping that the injectable medication (same thing, same dose as the tablets) will work a bit better for her. And, hopefully, won't upset her tummy the way the tablets were starting to.

Now on to other changes.....

We are beginning to contemplate what it would be like if we headed for the home country, permanently. Is this even an option at this point?  Let's just say that I'm daydreaming. I have wondered if it would be hard to readjust to life 'back home' after being in such an exotic place. I know there would be readjustment, but I think it would be easier than it was to move to our current location.  We've been ex-pats so long, what would it cost to be repatriated? Hmmmm......let's think about that. Here's the list of what we'd have to buy or put money down on. 

• Deposit on a flat
• Utility deposits
• 2 cars (would like to leave the old vehicle at the farm)
• living room furniture (preferrably yummy leather sofa, big and comfortable, with a big matching chair)
• 3 beds
• 2 desks with chairs
• washer and hopefully a forced air dryer
• A bunch of kitchen junk
• bath towels
• shower curtains
• bathroom rugs

In other words, a lot of money. Kind of makes my head hurt. When one becomes an expat, one doesn't always think about the cost of going home. A friend of mine here, from the same home country, has nothing back in the home country. No house, no car, nothing. (We at least have a vacation home/family farm, an old but functional vehicle, and another house that is currently rented out.  And, the rented out house has all the appliances.) And, because shipping containers can take a while, one has to buy temporary furniture or find furnished housing. Finding affordable furnished housing is not easy when you have kids and pets. For us, it's cheaper and better to just buy some furniture (upgrading what we already own), IF we ever moved back to the home country.  I'm just glad that we thought at least a little bit 5 years ago about what it would take for us to be repatriated.

I'm know that I am homesick when I start making lists like this. I have no clue what the next year will bring, but I'm hoping for more time in the ocean at least. 

Peace.

The 'Video' and the Madness, and Marhaba

Ok. I'm going to talk about 'THE' video. If you have no clue what video I'm referring to, take you head out of the sand and pick up a newspaper from today or the previous couple of days.  Yes, THAT video.

Ok. Now that we're all on the same page....

Via the modern joy that is social networking, I'm seeing words of racism and hate in response to those who are protesting the video with violence. First, I understand that the video's message is bad. Second, I also know that it was of a very poor quality. Clearly, it was not done by some fancy Hollywood producer.

I am certainly not condoning violence. Got it? Violence is bad. Violence is way not cool. Violence does not solve anything. Again, got it?  Just in case you missed it: violence = evil.

If you are one of my readers in the States, sit and think about who these protesters likely are. They are likely uneducated about US laws regarding the freedom of speech. Many of the countries where these protests are taking place have censorship in some form or another. Folks outside of the US don't always understand or even begin to comprehend what freedom of speech means. Many people outside of the States would find it almost impossible to believe that 'the video' is allowed to be out in the public domain without approval from the US government or having been through some kind of censorship process.  Many people outside of the States just don't understand that the folks who were involved with the making of the video can't be arrested for making it. But, the fact that one guy involved in making the video was hauled in by police in the States for questioning to see if he violated his parole (ie his get out of jail card) says that there are folks in the States who really do care about what is happening. But, the folks who care have to work within the law.

Further....the question begs to be asked, "What other reasons would these people have to protest against the US?"  Are they being 'whipped up' by somebody with a political agenda? Are they angry at their own government about something? Are they simply uneducated?

The devout Muslims I know would never resort to or even condone violence. Are they offended by the video? Of course they are.  But, resorting to violence is never a way to have a conversation. Anybody who resorts to violence is only hurting themselves in the end.

There is a word in Arabic, 'marhaba', that is used as hello or welcome. So, if someone rings my door bell, I open the door,  I could say, "Marhaba! Please come in!" Some would say that the origin of 'marhaba' is Persian, and it originally meant, 'no harm can come from me to you'. Others would say that the word originated in Aramaic (the language of Jesus?) and originally meant, essentially, God is love.

'Marhaba' reminds me of the Middle East that I know.

Peace.

Edit (22 September) I just went and re-read this, and it could sound like I am defending those who are protesting the video. I am not defending their actions. I do not condone violence. Period.

Clearly, he just doesn't get it

First, let me begin with a link:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/11/mitt-romney-consulate-attack_n_1875906.html?utm_hp_ref=elections-2012

I find it totally amazing that the Romney campaign is trying to criticise the Obama administration over this. Really?  Wow.  I seriously don't think that the Romney campaign has a clue.

Ok. Here comes my not professional opinion. Ready?

When one is dealing with a group of fanatics, violence will only beget violence. Hate-filled language will only beget hate-filled language. 

Have a look at this quote from the article:
"The violence took a domestic political turn, in part thanks to a statement released early Tuesday by the staff of the Cairo embassy, which condemned the film and the "continuing efforts by misguided individuals to hurt the religious feelings of Muslims – as we condemn efforts to offend believers of all religions." "

The statement was written by a member of embassy staff.  AND clearly that member of staff understands this type of situation. By doing the opposite of 'backlash', the situation is potentially diffused. If you just yell back at someone who is yelling at you, the yelling will only get louder.  If you say, "Yes. I see you have a point. That is very difficult and frustrating. I can see why you are so upset."  That is a statement that can't be cause for further fighting and yelling. 

Living where we live, we work/volunteer/go to school with people from many different cultures. In many cultures, there is a concept that may be unfamiliar to many Westerners - 'saving face'.  Meaning, that to apologize for something comes across as very very weak.  If you say you are sorry, you really lose face. This changes how disagreements are settled.  That means there's not 'compromise' in the way a Westerner thinks of compromise. 

So, in order to diffuse a situation, common ground must be found.  Than, find a common goal and work towards that.  Focus on what is shared and the same rather than what is separate and different.  It is clear to me that the embassy staffer 'gets' this.  Find the common ground and say, "Hey, I understand what you are saying."  Understanding is not agreement.  And, there is deep deep wisdom in 'turn the other cheek'. 

I can not fathom Romney running US foreign policy. Wake up and smell the coffee people.  Romney isn't that much smarter on foreign policy than the average American Joe. But, the American president needs to be.

Peace.

Mixed Emotions

Well, this is the start of year 6 for us here in the Middle East.  And, seriously, I approach this year with mixed emotions. 

It is nice to be 'home' with our pets and our friends.  But, every year when I come back from summer holiday, yet another friend has moved away. It's great getting to meet and be friends with so many amazing women, but it's very hard saying 'see ya later' to people each year.  I recently went to a big 'women's meeting' where I sat with a group of ladies, two I knew and the rest were total strangers to me.  I did my best to be polite, happy and helpful to the newcomers, but for the first time I found myself not wanting to spend too much effort reaching out.  A good friend and I left the event/meeting the moment it was over and went and enjoyed a quiet coffee together.  I keep handing out my email and number to ladies new to the area, but I'm just feeling down like, "Hey, am I going to just have to say good-bye to you too?" 

My munchkins are happy and successful in school here which is a wonderful thing.  Yet I really wonder how it would affect them to live their entire childhoods in a country that they can never fully call 'home'?  Is this a good thing or a bad thing? When we came here, we thought 2 years for sure, maybe 3.  Things have sure changed as we begin year SIX!

I find myself constantly in need of 're-focusing'.  Meaning that I frequently have to remind myself about what is good here, what I like about being here.  As I think about the home country, I have to remind myself that the grass always looks greener on  the other side.  But wait! That's right! There is grass on the other side! You see?  I need to re-focus...constantly.

The husband and I are seriously beginning to contemplate a return to the home country. We are at a point in the munchkins' schooling that this is the 'do or die' year.  We either go back this year or we are committed to staying here another 6 years until we get them both off to university.  That's a daunting thought.  Do we really want to live here for a total of 12 years? I'm just not sure.

Within the next few weeks we are going to spend a weekend out on a beach and snorkeling.  The fish and sea turtles are one of the things I love about this place.  I told the husband that if we are going to stay here than we need to spend more time enjoying being here. Last year, with Munchkin #2's rheumatoid arthritis diagnosis was a rough year for me. We didn't do much roaming around. We need to do things differently this year.

And, if pursuing fun stuff and enjoying family time doesn't help, than maybe it will be time to go home.

Peace.

The Cost of Health Care

Very opinionated stuff....you've been warned. And secondly, you can probably guess where I'm from, but does it really matter?

As the parent of a munchkin with health issues that require long term maintenance (rheumatoid arthritis), I am deeply familiar with the cost of health care.

Let me quote you some cost comparisons. I am going to do this in US dollars since I think more folks are familiar with the $'s exchange rates.

This is a comparison of cost between tip top quality private health care we have experienced in the Middle East (by US or European trained/licensed doctors) and health care in the United States.  I am doing some minimal rounding, so please use this for discussion/thoughtfulness only. Ready?

Visit to pediatrician for very bad cold/flu with a throat swab test:
Middle East: $80   US: $200

MRI (top quality images) of a major joint (like a wrist or a knee):
Middle East: $390   US: $3,300

X-rays of a major joint (like a wrist or a knee):
Middle East: $150 [but need to make certain lead apron is used on patient]   US: $350

10mg/week of Methotrexate tablets for one month:
Middle East: $24 (no insurance)  US: $20 (that's the insurance co-pay)

Hmmmm.....really?  Yes. Wow.  Is health care here the most perfect in the world? Certainly not. But, the 'maintenance' kind of stuff is reasonable.

So, here's what I think are the major reasons for the cost difference.  First, the US has very high medical malpractice insurance rates because doctors get sued so very much. Second, many people in the States can't afford these types of health care rates. But they go get health care anyway.  I can't imagine not being able to get help for my child.  They then either don't pay their bill or only pay a small piece at a time thus putting hospitals/clinics into a cash pinch creating a vicious circle that keeps getting bigger and bigger. If it's your life or the life of your child, wouldn't you go into that clinic?

I am flabbergasted how many Americans whine about how they don't want socialized medicine.  I understand that.  But, if there was REAL and GOOD paid for health care for low and moderate income folks, AND if there was tort reform, the US wouldn't be in this mess. 

Suck it up folks.  Only a compassionate government with big deep pockets can fix this. Smaller government with shallow pockets is going to make the average American bankrupt and dirt poor as soon as sickness strikes. It's time to start taxing the rich and pass tort reform.  Years ago, I had to have a c-section.  The total cost was $20,000.  I was in-network everything.  Should have been a bill of about $2000 give or take as my portion, or so I thought.  I ended up paying over $8000 - even after fighting with the insurance company -and the constant phoning from the hospital creditors made me feel almost like someone was going to come repossess my son. It took a long time, but the bill was paid. But, it financially set my family back years.

Do I want to move back to my home country? Yes.  I am ready to give up lower cost health care yet? No.

Peace.

Back in the sand box

Well, we are back in the sand.

Came back to extreme heat and humidity, the irrigation pump, my glorious forced air clothes dryer and washing machine are all 'out'. The electrical circuit that they are all on is not functioning. I cut the electricity to all three and tried to reset the breaker. The breaker won't reset.

While we were gone, the landlord's 'fix' was to have a gardener (not an electrician) come out and cobble together a bunch of wires (of different gauges) using electrical tape. This 'newly minted' set of wires was sent run from our irrigation pump to the junction/breaker box (picture about 45 feet/14m) of wire running into other wires coming out of the bottom of the breaker panel. Really creepy. At least the grass wasn't dead but about half of my flowers were.

And....naturally, the husband is away on business.

So, I've called a local 'fix' company that came recommended by two people. We'll see how it goes. I'm not holding my breath.

In the meantime, my garden is dying and Munchkin #2 has offered to help me do the laundry in the bath tub. The cobbled together wire was just too creepy/scary to leave in place.

Welcome back!

Peace.